You turn the corner and there we are:
Dark red unconscious beauty and friendship
Yellow like fresh butter. Pink, a small girl’s bedroom,
Skipping round hopeful white in walled seclusion.
Circular paths built for the ambulation of romance
Held in arms from bud to bloom by remembrance
Benches and the ghosts of the couples who sat here
Quiet and united with packed lunches, and who loved this garden.
It’s a garden of first kisses and declarations,
Planted, cultivated colour in grey faceless streets.
Here the barest touch of an arm could bloom
Into moonlight dancing and I love you.
This is a detour on our way, a giggle in a library
A deliberate fall down the rabbit hole.
We never made our destination.
I love it, particularly the reference to Alice in Wonderland! Keep up the great work!
ReplyDeleteHi Zoe, I also love this, I think some of the strongest images are in the first section and as a poem it is very complete. It feels like a journey which I think may have been the intention? I like the library too - such romantic places in my mind (though not always in reality!). The only line I'm not sure fits is line 7/8, though that is not a criticism as it is still very good, it just feels slightly out of sync to me.
ReplyDeleteVery impressed :o)
xx
They were exactly the lines I was unsure of too, it seems to lose momentum, but I had this clear image in my head of old couples who have those benches with plaques dedicated to them, sitting together in the garden, but I can't quite seem to get the image from my head into words!
ReplyDeleteThanks,
Zx